When I first created a blog I had in my mind that I'd post daily, often. Yeah, right. Life happens and guess what?! I actually am crazed where something has to give and often times it's the one thing I love most...writing. Not the kind of writing I do daily as part of my career, rather, the kind that lets me get out thoughts and feelings out on paper (or a computer).
Well, tonight I'm starting again b/c frankly I miss it. I love writing. I'm not the world's best writer, but I'm me and well, that's okay. As I sit here thinking about what to write, of course I'm drawn to what's happening tomorrow....Caroline's 2nd Birthday.
I have tears b/c I don't know where the last two years have went. I've cherished every moment of them I know but somehow they've still gone by. Fleeting by really. When I became a mom, I came to know that utterly raw love where you'd do anything for your little person, even run in front of a truck if it meant they were safe.
Yup, that's me. When CJ came into my life, wow. I was blown away by how much the love emotion grew and multiplied.
CJ...she is my defiant, temper tantrum, hot headed two year old. Her smile and laugh makes me instantly light up. Whenever I'm having a rough day, I think of her and instantly smile b/c she lights up a room....and commands it too all at once! But that's Caroline. And I wouldn't change her for anything.
The thing that's funny about her is that she can pull a little prank on you and know it! I suspect she's going to be my class clown and the one I get called about. A LOT.
But that's okay b/c she's CJ and it's who she is.
As a child growing up I struggled with insecurity. Who doesn't right?! But my parents always reinforced what an amazing individual I was and that I was uniquely wonderful...because I am Sarah. Well, that's what I want for CJ and Hannah....to be confident in who they are b/c wow, what incredibly little girls they are. (and perhaps a little of that will rub back on me b/c well, I still struggle with it!)
Yes, they're different and that's great! Yet, they also share an amazing bond that only sisters do (kinda an expert on that since I do have 3 sisters myself!). I love how they talk together, Hannah pretends to read CJ books, they watch out for each other and just like being together. Sure, they fight and hit and push BUT at the end of the day their sisters =)
So, tomorrow, Sept. 27, at 11:02 AM I'm going to smile and remember the day two years ago when Caroline Joanne Hartigan entered the world, screaming and all!! I love you CJ with all my heart and sole....I am honored and blessed to be your mom.
